What I Would Tell My Younger Self

Cherish the old.

Love the sun-fading on your quilt that speaks of sunny days stored up for Winter's chill.

Smile at the bent pages of your Bible that has fed your soul so many times.

Value the tell-tale wrinkles around the eyes that reveal someone's habitual smile.

Appreciate the outdated technology that encourages you to live real life.

Enjoy that annoying quirk because someday you will give anything to have that person annoy you one more time.

Return to the song that was the soundtrack to so many valleys and mountaintops.

Make that same-old recipe that is somehow just as good as when you were five.

Treasure who you have because they are yours.

The constant pursuit of the next new thing becomes a pursuit of newness itself. It is frivolous, fruitless, and deeply unsatisfying.

Embracing the old for contentment's sake transforms the shabby into the loved, the repetitive into the comforting, the not-good-enough into the simple joy, the despised into the treasured.

"For I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content." Philippians 4:11

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“One Big Circle- Day 05,” © 2012 Steven Worster, used under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial license: http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc/3.0/.
Scripture taken from the New King James Version. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Single Identity

I recently shared my testimony with a special group of women, and now I am posting a portion of it here in hopes it might bless someone else!

 

I was actually quite content to be single all through my teens.  But there came a day in my early twenties when a good friend told me out of the blue that she had begun a courtship, and suddenly my "contentment" evaporated. It was very easy for me to think that I was content and happy with my singleness until He gave others relationships. And, like the child whining because a sibling got a bigger scoop of ice cream, I started to feel sorry for myself, wondering, "Why does she get to get married and I don't?" And it was then that the first lie about singleness began to creep into my thinking and subtly affect how I viewed myself.

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Lie #1: This lie says that if marriage is a gift from God, then it is inherently unfair that I am doing what is right and still am not married.

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If I indulge this attitude I am loving God only for what I can get from Him, not for Himself. I am saying that the reward for my righteousness is whatever makes me happy--like marriage--and if I don't get it, then life is not fair!

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Truth #1: The reward for righteousness is God Himself, and salvation. 

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If I remain single my whole life that doesn't mean that I didn't win the prize--because the prize is Christ! If I have Him in singleness or in marriage, I have enough.

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Lie #2: I am not married because I am not good enough. 

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Not beautiful enough, not interesting enough. Or I'm too introverted, too much of a book worm, or too conservative. This is not only a lie of Satan, but it was a huge warning sign that I had placed my identity in what others thought of me, not in my position in Christ. If you have struggled with falling for this lie, it may be a warning sign of a misplaced identity in your life as well. Many women of the world also recognize these thoughts as lies, but they respond with equally as empty proclamations of feminism. 

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Truth #2: Only God defines my worth.

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The truth is that I was expecting marriage to validate that I was worthy of being loved: I was making marriage my god, and I was unsatisfied, for only God defines my worth.

There are so many amazingly encouraging verses I could share, but I will just share this one that tells me that God chose before the foundations of the world to adopt me. 

Ephesians 1:3-6 " Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ, just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and without blame before Him in love, having predestined us to adoption as sons by Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the good pleasure of His will, to the praise of the glory of His grace, by which He made us accepted in the Beloved."

My value is not found in what others think of me: if it were, I would be sunk! It is not even found in my own righteousness, for my righteousness is no cleaner than filthy rags! My identity, whether in this stage of singleness, or possibly in marriage in the future, is found in my position in Christ.

Although part of my purpose right now is preparing myself with the qualities and skills a wife and mother would need to have, those are characteristics any godly woman should have! But my purpose also includes living for Christ now. Being content with what I have now. Being a servant now. Don't wait for "later" or for a magical wedding day to jumpstart your life! 

God brought me through this identity change several years ago, and when I realized that my place of singleness is not just a waiting around time but is actually God's best for me right now, I was able to then discover that God has a purpose for this time in my life.  The amazing providential thing is that at that point when I was learning contentment I never could have dreamed that in just a year or so my contentment would be tested in an even bigger way.  

I went from having friends begin relationships to having my identical twin sister and best friend starting a courtship, getting married, and moving across the continent.  I am so grateful to look back now and see that before that happened God was preparing me to trust in Him, to take Him as my reward, to find my worth in Him, to rest in His will for me, and to identify myself by my relationship with Him, not my relationship status.  When I truly accepted and believed who I am in Christ and that this time of my life is His very best for me right now, it made going through all of those life changes so much easier!

The beauty and mystery of each of our life stories will come into focus only from the vantage point of eternity.  For then we will realize that even the God-ordained relationship of marriage is only temporary, and that when I stand before Him in Heaven I will be accepted as part of His Bride, the church.  And that is my beautiful and true identity!

P.S.To read about a third and fourth lie we can be tempted to believe about singleness, check out these posts:
Single Jesus
The Myth of the No Man's Land Between Childhood and Marriage

“I Spy,” © 2011 Flood G, used under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial license: http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc/3.0/.
Scripture taken from the New King James Version. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

Look Up

June brought in warm evenings like summer's heralding banner, and the rich woolly sky blanketed the sleepy house where some friends and I were cuddled up for a late night.  My phone suddenly buzzed at me with a message from my mama, but not the one I was expecting: "Go look outside!"

"Girls--listen to this!" I cried, and we all jumped up, heavy eyelids instantly opened in wonder.

We leapt outside in our bare feet, spiraling in circles with our arms outstretched and our eyes heavenward, trying to spot Jupiter and Venus converging into one visual spectacular.  Desperate to beat the expiration of a perhaps once-in-a lifetime sight, we ran down to the golf course, but trees shut us in on every side.

We charged back up to the main road and sprinted down the asphalt, past dark houses that scowled at our wakefulness at such an hour.  When I rounded the last bend in the road, coming to where it sprouted off from a busy street, the sky unrolled across the horizon above a treeless field, and there the great conjunction of the two planets shone in a star-of-Bethlehem-like brilliance.

The two planets danced so closely together that their brightness was mesmerizing to anyone who laid eyes on the sight.  And we were no exception.  The four of us made a rock our arm chair, and I sat in awe with my hands clasped around my legs.

There was no clock to fetter the flitting moments down.

There was no rhythm ticking an impending deadline besides the unison beating of our hearts.

So we watched in reverent silence, our backs masked by the darkness, but our faces lit by the light of the star.  With such a sight glittering in our eyes, we couldn't help but sing hymns of praise to the Morning Star, and there was something special about that worship by the roadside that I won't ever forget.

Time lapsed...cars streaked by...but the star, my friends, and I remained.

It struck me as we sat how odd we must have looked to the passersby.  But when a busy, harried soul drove by and saw four women with their eyes rapturously fixed on the sky, I wondered if he would follow our gaze and look up, even if just out of curiosity.

In that moment on that warm June evening a chill went down my back.  For through my wondering I found a rich nugget that I've carried with me these past six months.

Shouldn't my eyes perpetually be fixed with equally rapturous delight on Jesus the Morning Star?

And shouldn't I be so enthralled by and illuminated with His light that all who pass me can't help but follow my gaze and stare, not at me, but at Who I am looking to?

Yes and yes.

And if at the end of my days it is said that the best analogy for the thrust of my life was that beautiful, worshipful evening of looking up, I will be satisfied.  If it is said of my life that all who looked at me couldn't help but look to Jesus because of me, my mission will be complete. 

“We Choose to See Vol. 002,” © 2013 AMRenault, used under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial license: http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc/3.0/.

For When You're Ready to Give Up

I felt like I was gripping a cobwebby tightrope above a vast and murky chasm.

And even as my toes curled around the lifeline, my arms flailed as I was pelted with lie after lie:

You're a failure if you can't even get it together here!

God is far away from you.  You'll never be close to Him.

You're only a big fat pretender to say you're a Christian with this lurking sin.

And there I could have fallen into the bottomless death of discouragement had not the sunlight of truth dawned, and I looked down.  In that instance, I saw that it was all a farce.

While my arms had flailed weakly against the onslaught of lies, my feet had been walking along the lie all along.  For the rays of sunlight revealed that there was no chasm beneath the path on which God was leading me.  Instead, I was quiveringly walking a tightrope only an inch above firm and solid ground.  The chasm, then, was only between the facade of the precarious tightrope and the reality of that protected path.  It was a great chasm--but great in deception, not in depth.

The enemy wanted me to imagine that I needed to claw for sure footing when God had already given it.

The enemy wanted me to fear an imminent fall when I would only be falling into my Shepherd's arms.

Most crucially, the enemy wanted me to believe I was already defeated when in fact the victory had already been won.

The roughness of the path, the sorrow, the pain--that was all too real.  But the yawning chasm was but a rickety backdrop no better than a middle school drama set, designed to drive me to cling to cobwebs of comfort rather than to the firm foundation of Jesus Christ.  

How trustworthy is Jesus' path and Jesus' love for me? Remember, He is the one who will even go to the extent of stopping the sun from setting to protect His people: 

"And there has been no day like that, before it or after it, that the LORD heeded the voice of a man; for the LORD fought for Israel." {Joshua 10:14}

This is the greatest chasm-destroyer I know: He has fought for you...He has fought for me, and He has already won the victory on the cross.  So let's live in this beautiful reality:

"‘Death is swallowed up in victory’ ‘O death, where is your sting? O Hades, where is your victory?’  It is sin which gives death its power, and it is the Law which gives sin its strength. All thanks to God, then, who gives us the victory over these things through our Lord Jesus Christ! And so brothers of mine, stand firm! Let nothing move you as you busy yourselves in the Lord’s work. Be sure that nothing you do for him is ever lost or ever wasted." {I Corinthians 15:55-58, PHILLIPS} 

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“The Chasm,” © 2007 Eric, used under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial license: http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc/3.0/.

Joshua 10:14 taken from the New King James Version. Copyright © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. Used by permission. All rights reserved.
I Corinthians 15:55-58 taken from J. B. Phillips, "The New Testament in Modern English", 1962 edition by HarperCollins

The Real McCoy

Who Are You?

Who are you really? Are you the responsible person your employer says you are? Are you the wise person those you are discipling say you are? Are you the good-hearted person those discipling you say you are? Are you the rambunctious person those who only knew you as a child say you are? Are you the disrespectful person your critics say you are? Are you the cold-hearted person your enemies say you are? Are you the person you think you are? Are you the person others think you are? Are you some amalgamation of all of the above, such that you are both nothing and everything in one fell swoop?

Wounds and Kisses

Give full credence to these voices and you are in grave danger. Blacklist these voices immediately and you risk ignoring a God-sent "Nathan" or "Barnabas." For if you believe and act on the words of every critic, you will become a broken and manipulated person who has forgotten that he is an image-bearer and who disbelieves the praise of loved ones. If you soak in every praise, every drop of flattery, and an ocean of love and forbearance, you'll find yourself a haughty, narcissistic, dependent individual who needs the acceptance of others like a parasite needs a host. You'll turn deaf ears to the words of pleading critics trying to show you the error of your ways.

"Do you look at things according to the outward appearance? If anyone is convinced in himself that he is Christ's, let him again consider this in himself, that just as he [is] Christ's, even so we [are] Christ's." {2 Corinthians 10:7 NKJV}

There is an opinion that matters more than any voice in your ear or head. Are you Christ's? If you are a blood-bought sinner, then you are now a child of the King, known by Him completely, utterly, and perfectly. Anything good you have done is through Him; any sin you have committed is covered by Him. You are made in His image, you are His masterpiece. And so are your critics and your group of adoring fans. 

So take it to the Lord. Take the criticism and the jabs and lay it before your Father Who knows you more than you know yourself. If you truly have the character flaw of which someone spoke, then you have not been unjustly accused. If this is not a character flaw of yours, your faithfulness to continue to act with character will eventually bring fruit. And, whether we're talking of praise or criticism, if your primary concern is not how you're looking on the outside (oooh!! does that look right? how will she perceive this or that? will I be able to convince him that this is who I truly am?), but rather to be known by God and to do all for God, controlled by the love of Christ and convinced by the unity that ALL Christians have together in Christ, then you have just hit the nail on the head. God will work on your character flaw--whether perceived or real. "Vindication" may not ever come. But if you can manage to do what you do for God, and let the rest take care of itself, then you will be in a place of peace. If you do what you do to convince man of who you are (persuading people because of your fear of man, not your fear of the Lord), then you will remain erratic, running betwixt and between the whims of others.

Remember, though--there is just as much (if not more) danger in pleasing words. For doesn't Proverbs 27:6  say "Faithful [are] the wounds of a friend, But the kisses of an enemy [are] deceitful"? Take those kisses to God. Don't take advantage of them; don't act for them; don't ask for them.

Be Well Pleasing to Christ

"Therefore we make it our aim, whether present or absent, to be well pleasing to Him. For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ, that each one may receive the things [done] in the body, according to what he has done, whether good or bad. Knowing, therefore, the terror of the Lord, we persuade men; but we are well known to God, and I also trust are well known in your consciences. For we do not commend ourselves again to you, but give you opportunity to boast on our behalf, that you may have [an answer] for those who boast in appearance and not in heart. For if we are beside ourselves, [it is] for God; or if we are of sound mind, [it is] for you. For the love of Christ compels us, because we judge thus: that if One died for all, then all died; and He died for all, that those who live should live no longer for themselves, but for Him who died for them and rose again." {2 Corinthians 5:9-15 NKJV}

 Live a life controlled by Christ and who you genuinely are will be known not only to God, but also to you.

Photo Credit

Quixotic

The Miniature Schnauzer tramps along with head held high and nose quivering with stimulation. He spies a Great Dane approaching and without a moment's consideration, he strains at his leash, barking and jumping wildly to announce his jurisdiction in the presence of this imposter. The respective Masters exchange amused glances to see such a small, precocious dog challenge an animal three times his size. The Schnauzer doesn't see their condescension, nor is he aware of the size difference. He has never looked in a mirror, stepped on a scale, or realized that his name is Miniature Schnauzer. In his mind, he is every bit the Great Dane's equal--and more--and so he barks with all the bravado of a German Shepherd.

 

People may see miniature before your name; they may laugh at your naivete; they may hand you a mirror and remind you of what you look like; they may pull out a calendar and recall your past. Our God does not do this, for He has chosen the weak and the foolish to confound the strong and the wise. Submit to Him wholly and then throw away your mirror and your measuring stick, for He may very well replace the practical with the quixotic, calling you to defeat a giant with a sling-shot, or to witness to a gruff man, or to raise 17 children.

"Therefore [it is] of faith that [it might be] according to grace, so that the promise might be sure to all the seed, not only to those who are of the law, but also to those who are of the faith of Abraham, who is the father of us all (as it is written, "I have made you a father of many nations") in the presence of Him whom he believed--God, who gives life to the dead and calls those things which do not exist as though they did; who, contrary to hope, in hope believed, so that he became the father of many nations, according to what was spoken, "So shall your descendants be." And not being weak in faith, he did not consider his own body, already dead (since he was about a hundred years old), and the deadness of Sarah's womb. He did not waver at the promise of God through unbelief, but was strengthened in faith, giving glory to God, and being fully convinced that what He had promised He was also able to perform. And therefore "it was accounted to him for righteousness."" {Romans 4:16-22 NKJV}

God has called you—isn’t that enough? 




Photo Credit: Reuben Yau
Photo Credit: dailyinvention
Photo Credit: Renee
New King James Version, © 1982 by Thomas Nelson, Inc. All rights reserved. Used by permission.

Favorites from 2013

Almost five years into this grand experiment called a web log, blogging has become a natural bi-weekly habit as I observe my surroundings, take stock of my inner ponderings, choose the most interesting of the several dozen pontifications that were profound enough to be remembered a few days later, and then type it up, revise it, and publish it on Tuesday morning. Some posts end up weird, others mildly entertaining, and a few (I hope) profound.

As 2013 slips away, I'd like nothing better than to celebrate the successes (and forget the failures) with a countdown. First, I share with you the top five most-visited posts on One Bright Corner:

1 

The Night the Stars Streaked by Lauren

Mikaela and I had been sent to bed long ago, but the falling summer sun was so orange and bright through our window and our gabled bedroom was so warm and stifling that we were certainly not inclined to fall asleep. We could wield our tongues with each other for time without end, and in the course of our whispered conversation we soon had crept out of bed to enjoy the night. We carefully opened the window and breathed in the sultry summer air. Sleep was forgotten. But the time of reckoning came. "Come down here," a voice suddenly called from the ground below the window. I slapped my hand to my mouth and stared, wide-eyed, at Mikaela. Read More>>

2

Waiting Room, Part II by Mikaela {but why would you want to start with Part II of this three part series? I'm linking to Part I!}

Have you ever asked God, “Why did you give me this vision—this desire that burns so greatly in my heart—only to leave it unfulfilled?” There are times in my life where I begin to think my hopes and dreams are just a mirage. Perhaps I was mistaken when I believed God anointed me for a very special task. Was I tuned in to the wrong station when I heard Him so clearly point me to marriage and motherhood? This isn't just an issue of marriage, though: college, discipling, and teaching music have all been points of desire and doubt in my life as well. Read More>>

3

Six Little Light Bulbs for a Rainy Day by Lauren 

Fun and random facts that offer a snapshot of our life in 2010. Read More>>

4

Lord, Let Me Declare by Mikaela
On my nightstand, one book has had the place of honor for a decade. This book, which began life as a charming black-covered creation with vivid red corners, is now a shabby stack of over 200 bound papers. The cover is long gone, the edges are curling, and the first ten pages have escaped the binding. This book, you see, began in the ninth year of my life, is my journal. Her name is Louisa, and here I offer you a look at my life through the last decade, complete with authentic spelling, punctuation, and grammar errors (oh, my!). Read More>>

5

Little Women by Mikaela
There is a little book which has resided on our family’s bookshelf as long as I can remember. Yet try as I might, I could never manage to finish the exactly 500 page volume. I began it at least half a dozen times over the years, never making it much past page fifty, despite its liveliness and my interest in it. Henry Thoreau was right, however, when he said, “read the best books first, or you may not have a chance to read them at all,” and so this very morning I completed the book: Little Women. If you have never gotten around to reading this treasure, I must warn you that while I empathize with your plight, I am on a mission to proselytize you. Read More>>

Since the most-visited posts give older posts a decided advantage in accumulating page views, and since only one of these posts was actually posted in 2013, and since everyone likes cliff notes, summaries, and big blinking arrows that say "turn here," allow me to present my personal top five favorite posts from 2013:

6

A Love Story by Mikaela

This is not a story of love at first sight. This is not a simple story of love, though this is the simple version. At times, it was messy and difficult and hard and required both people to die to their interest in each other. Nevertheless: this is my love story. Read More>>

7

Pastor in Dreadlocks by Lauren

“Mom, who’s Pilate?” “He’s the big shot.  Be quiet”

“I can’t see!”

“What do those words on the screen say?”

“Oh…oh…I am thirsty.  I am really thirsty!”

I was at an Easter play, trying desperately to get “in the mood”, but with the running commentary going on behind me, I might as well have been in Costco watching The Passion of the Christ on their big screen TV displays while people around me munched Polish sausages. I was getting fed up. Read More>>

8

Capital Offenses by Lauren

Capitalization, in case the concept wasn’t painted across your forehead in grade two, is extremely important.  For instance, the time I forgot to capitalize God’s “Law” and several other synonyms in an important college paper all about God’s Law…and was docked ten points.  Ouch. Lesson learned.  If you want to gain points on school papers and camouflage your innate blondness, I highly recommend you capitalize on the discipline of capitalization. 

Read More>>

9

God--You're Getting Bigger! by Mikaela 

Which brings God the greater glory: to be worshipped by wretchedly sinful, incompetent beings or to be worshipped by completed, perfected beings? Read More>>  

10

In Theory by Lauren 
I wonder if Thomas Edison were one of our generation whether he would have theorized 10,000 possibilities for creating the light bulb, but never actually tested them. I wonder if Paul Revere were one of our generation whether he would have moaned about the poor colonists who were about to be taken unawares, but never actually mounted a horse to warn them. Read More>>

 

It's always fun to reminisce and look back, so I hope you enjoyed this journey as much as I did! I'm also enthusiastically looking forward to 2014; happy New Year everyone! Do you have a favorite memory or blog post (from your own blog) to share? I'd love to hear about it in the comments section! 

Photo Credit: ginnerobot